I'm very ,very sorry about your Father's death it must be a terrible time for you and your Mum. The most support you can give to your Mum is to tell her you love her and you're there for her because it's also a hard time for you too. It's very early days yet and your Mum will probably go through all sorts of emotions and reactions over perhaps the next two years or so. You need some nice things in your life and don't feel that you should have to give up everything that you do too. It's difficult to predict how grief will take it's course and your Mum will feel very empty and lost. If you can give her some practical support like help in the house, shopping that will help a great deal, as she might not feel up to much for a time. Eventually your Mum will probably feel like going out and meeting people but don't put too much pressure on her yet to do anything away from home. When my husband died, at first and for a while, I didn't feel like being away from home, but I love going out now. What I found most helpful was an arm around me and some practical help. My son had to be abroad and I would have loved him around. You're only 13 and very thoughtful and caring and I'm sure your Mum will appreciate anything you can do for her. I do hope you will be alright too as it must be very hard for you. Do you have kind relations and friends who can give you support too? Let us know how you get on.
First of all, please accept my condolences. The death of a parent is difficult for anyone; to have to deal with it when you're only 13 is doubly so.
Second, I don't know if this will make you feel any better, but your concern for your mother shows great maturity and depth of character. Your father may be gone, but it sounds like your mother has at least one loving relative to whom she can turn.
Your mother is going to go through a very stressful and emotional time. The absolute best thing you can do is to be there for her when she needs you, but also to give her time to grieve in her own way. If's a difficult balancing act, and you're probably going to make a mistake (everyone does). The important thing is to keep the lines of communication with your mother open.
The WORST thing you could do is "force" her to cheer up. It won't happen. If you put on an act just to get her to smile, you'll only make her feel worse; she'll be concerned that YOU aren't acting like yourself.
I know this is going to sound hard, but you just have to keep on living your life, just as your mother is going to have to keep on living hers. It's true that a part of us want the world to stop when a loved one dies. But the world doesn't stop, and we don't stop living. And by CONTINUING to live, and continuing to show your love and concern to your mother, you're really keeping the best part of your father alive.
Don't know if any of this helps. You and your mom will be in my prayers.
I am really sorry to hear about your father. I know 100% what it feels like. As my father also passed away and I'm also 13.
Something we share in common if you ever want to talk to me my email addy is [email protected]. Plz feel free, that way we can talk to each other and share are feelings, I can get to know you and you can get to know me.
The main thing is let your mum cry as much as she has to. A very tragic thing has happened. Talk to her, tell her your there for her, but don't overdo it. Sometimes it takes a while to recover but once she feels alright then talk to her. You will also find, being open to her will help a lot as you will feel closer to each other. Plz email me.
Well, I know what your going through because I lost my dad when I was 13 as well. But I am now a 16 year old and I know what I did and maybe it will help you.
Talk about your dad. Make jokes about the things he used to do. Make SURE you talk about him all the time...especially if you have younger siblings who aren't talking about him...they could feel something and you might feel it too and you can share.
Also..I feel if you talk to him (your father) about your Mom all the time. Tell him how Mom is doing or tell him about you because he is right there! I know very cheesy but if you believe it then it's true.
Your Mom I bet is your hero. She is the one you always come to when your sad. You'll be your Moms hero. Make sure she knows that you will be there to talk to her and you can cry together...cause that's what happens and people don't like it but we cry. Just let her know you love her so much and tell her you will be there for her.
Good luck - you will be very strong from this. Trust me.
First of all I am very sorry to hear this and express my heartily gratitude with you. May his soul rest in piece. It's really hard to take your self out of this situation but, we all have to depart from this world sooner or later.Now you really have a great responsibility on your shoulder because, I feel that it's not easy for you to handle this type of situation in that much early age. But nothing is impossible in this world.
You really have to take care of your mother and try to keep her happy, and also don't show your grief in front of her, when you will be happy then she will feel good. Try to engage her in some sort of activates like your daily home work and visits to park for physical exercise and a long walk etc.
Visit your relatives and invite them to your home as well. You have to give much company to your mother when she is sitting idle and, don't let her to think about past. The best thing for engage her, are social activates. Try to sleep with her in her room for some period of time. Always take a good care of her, and ensure her that, you both have to live for each other now and tell her that, if both of you will keep each other happy then it will give you the courage to live a healthy life.
All I can add to all of the above good advice is let your Mum talk about your Dad. She may not be ready yet but it will happen. I lost my Father when I was 14 years old. My Mum died when I was 21. We only had 7 years together and I did not do enough for her. I was not there to listen I was too busy being a teenager We always think we have tomorrow.
I am really very sorry to hear this. I want to talk with you personally. Can you make a call to me 09989484868 or mail me [email protected]. Plz don't forget to call.
