How Do You Handle Conflicts Well?

　　A conflict is the outcome of a clash or dispute over values, actions or interests, between two individuals, groups or societies. If you access a conflict psychologically, it results from the motivational level of one going down to accommodate another. The 'up' and 'down' leads to an adjustment, which may or may not fit into the immediate scheme of things. In fact, even if you do not admit to the clash or conflict, the mere need for adjustment spells it out.

　　It is very important to step back and analyze the cause for conflict. Look at the situation from a 'third person' perspective. This will help you narrow down on what exactly went wrong. However, it is very important to understand that a conflict is neither good nor bad. It is simply a stubborn stance and difference in outlook. The outcome of a conflict could be positive or disastrous, depending on how you handle the situation. It is important to try and organize an intervention in extreme cases. It does well to get a second opinion. The critical realization involves resolving and addressing the conflict and not suppressing it. The two dimensions that can help resolve a conflict effectively are: Is it really important for any one person involved to call the shots? And is it really important to allow the opposing person or group to sound 'right'?

Develop an assertive attitude while dealing with conflicts. Arguments or conflicts arise due to differences of opinion. As an assertive and confident person, you must listen to what the person says. There can be a grain of truth in what the person says. May be the person has got it all wrong but he 'believes' that his way is the right way. Criticizing him will only make him defensive or put him in a retaliatory mode. When you express an interest in what he is saying and give a listening ear, he feels respected.

Do not interrupt the person while speaking. If he is angry and mad, let him release it. Sooner or later, he will calm down. Tell him that you agree with some of the things that he has put forward. However also tell him that certain things are not beneficial to both of the conflicting parties. When you are stating something, make sure you back your statements with examples or valid reasons why you think you are correct. Never take sides in an argument. Explain things logically, impartially and considerately.

To handle a conflict one must know the meaning of it. A conflict is simply a rising situation that people differ on such as religion, race, cultural significance, etc. When facing a conflict one must yield to the other person demands or vice versa. Compromise is an importnat component of dealing with conflict (argument). Both must agree on a part of a contrast that resides in the conflict. For example, John is mad at sally for not giving him the remote to the tv. Both get upset and argue back and forth and almost an instance it escalates and a fight breaks out but before it does they decide to compromise (make both happy) and resolve the issue. When sally gets through with her show she will let John have the remote for a hour so he can watch what he wants to watch. They both agreed and decided that they will watch tv together. Compromising is a part of dealing with conflict. Another component of dealing with conflict is the reality of consquences. Knowing that a conflict will result in dangerous outcomes can easily resolve a conflict fast. If people or societies (different countries) will keep this in mind than there wouldn't be wars. Right? Haha!